It Was Worth It

Some time ago, there was a man who walked the earth.  He was of divine origin, a man of royal lineage.  But he was born into a life of poverty, misery, and shame to save a people who had been humiliated by a great empire of darkness.  And this empire used the threat of anguish on a cross to keep order in their world of silent insanity.

Some time ago, there was a man who walked the earth.  He was of divine origin, a man of royal lineage.  But he was born into a life of poverty, misery, and shame to save a people who had been exploited for most of their history.  He came into a world where men used the threat of anguish on a cross to keep order in a land of silent insanity.  This insanity was silent because the kingdom had roads, knowledge, medicine, and beautiful buildings such that it seemed as though man had come into a time of great prosperity.  This insanity was silent because to look at the great capital city of this empire, one would think that man had reached a new horizon of greatness and stature.  But beneath the sound of apparent splendor, there were men who were wrenched with self-loathing and women who dreaded the coming day.  And so this world was insane, but the insanity was silent and the threat of anguish on a cross maintained order, such that the people would not awake to the torment around them and feel compassion.

Some time ago, there was a man who walked the earth.  He was born into a life of poverty, misery, and shame but through it all he grabbed hold of his father with a fervor that none have had either before or after him.

Some time ago, there was a man who walked the earth.  He was born into a life of poverty, misery, and shame but through it all he grabbed hold of his father and with all of the strength of his love he rose to set at liberty them that were bruised and bring deliverance to the captives.  And this man did many great deeds for the people of his land and asked for little in return for his kindness except that people follow him and do as he had done.

Some time ago, there was a man who walked the earth.  He was born of a virgin and did many great deeds among the people of his land and he brought about an earthquake of compassion such that the protectors of order became aware of him.  And these protectors of order set about a momentum of silent insanity that overtook the man and thrust him upon a cross that brought him anguish and misery.  And while he was on the cross, none of the people who he had helped stood for him save three devoted woman of lowly stature.  And while he was on the cross, none of the people who he had fought for fought for him save three women who like most of the women of his day had muted voices and even less power.

When I was 19 years old I met a man who walked the earth some time ago.  I was watching Ben Hur and witnessed his compassion through the light of his shadow falling upon and healing two women with leprosy.  I saw this man’s compassion and was moved to tears of inspiration.  I threw up my hands and said, “My whole life is yours” to whoever had sent this man among us.  And at first, I had very little idea of what I had done.  But bit by bit I began to become aware of the torment around me and to feel compassion.

When I was 19 years old, I met a man of old who is, who was, and who is to come, and I began a journey of compassion.  And on this journey I made many mistakes, but always my path was guided by the fire of compassion and the sound of human unity.  And I did many deeds through the man and the inspiration that he gave me.  But somewhere along the way, the Lord of silent insanity who in truth is not really of this world, became aware of me and began to hunt me as he has hunted so many throughout the ages.

When I was 19 years old, I met a man full of fire and compassion and began a journey of warfare.  My weapons were not of this world, but were mighty to the pulling down of strongholds and the manifestation of kindness.  But somewhere along the way, the adversary became aware of me and thrust me onto a cross of anguish and misery.  And many who I had helped forsook me and the darkness was overwhelming.  And I began to wish for death as the sound of silent insanity tormented from me within and without.  And a blindness created from the beginning of darkness began to envelope me and I forgot that I was at war.

Some time ago, I met the greatest man that has ever lived or ever will live and he filled me with his power and love.  And I did many deeds and tried to walk a path of humility and honesty.  But on this path, the Lord of silent insanity attacked me and relentlessly sought to destroy me.  And I found a cross of pain and humiliation.  And as I endure this cross, many who I thought were allies have forsaken me and my love is waxing cold.  I fight with the temptation of death and I feel alone, forsaken, and forgotten.  But still there is a light within me that reminds me of love, and kindness, and compassion.  And I am holding tight to love with all of my being, fighting not to be overtaken by the shame and humiliation that I feel.  And with this love, I declare, that my journey is not in vain.  All the times that I have invited humiliation by being honest about my struggles instead of masking them with the façade of silent insanity.  All of the times that I have invited bitterness by loving those who did not love me in return.  All of the times that I have felt as though I am thoroughly alone, crying out in a wilderness of silent insanity.  With the last bit of love that I feel for a world that has not returned my kindness I declare that my journey has not been in vain.  For there is one who is with me.  And he sees me on my cross, and instead of shame he beams with pride over a warrior who is fighting for his very life against the sound of silent insanity from within and without.  And with his love I fight to endure until my breakthrough comes.  But until then, even on my cross, I declare that it was worth it.  For no matter what comes, I know that I have chosen correctly.  For no matter what comes, I know that I have joined the ranks of many who this life has forsaken but who cried out for love anyway.  In this moment of pain and anguish I reach to the sky and cry out, “It was worth it,” for I have fought for love and love will some day save me.

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